News

Self-control is what you build up, develop, create and learn by controlling your behavior repeatedly. We should regard self-control as a skill. It is not a character trait or a thing you have to have that lets you control your behavior (or a thing that not having it prevents you from doing so!)

If someone says, “I have no self-control over my drinking or drugging, or eating sweets or whatever,” it might be asked, “Are you well practiced at resisting your urges or opportunities to use or to overeat the wrong things?” The answer would likely be, “No.” This person is well practiced at giving in to those urges and opportunities to use. (No criticism from me! I did this for years and years.)…

Like any big change in life, emerging from the pandemic may be difficult for people who are newly sober.

A year ago, we were all reeling from the adjustments to pandemic life. Wearing masks felt confining and absurd; our tongues were still wrapping around new words like “social-distancing” and “quarantine.” And yet, over the past 12 months, pandemic life, with its social isolation, remote work and six-foot distances, has become our new normal. Now, as vaccines become more widespread and the world opens up, some people are finding that transition to be challenging and uncomfortable as well.

Family is forever, or at least, that’s what the chintzy wall stencils say.  During times of hardship, sickness, death, misfortune, mistakes, and malaise it is helpful to rest assured that our families will stand by us and help us.  My esteemed mentor, Dr. Horvath, often says that 90% of social support is who shows up.  Who shows up in the hospital during chemo?  Who shows up to console after a break-up or job loss?  Often times, family shows up when no one else will.  But who shows up when a so-called ‘addict’ hits the proverbial ‘rock bottom?’  Often times family members desert loved ones when addictive problems are at their most severe.  Why is an exception to the golden rule of family standing by one another made when it comes to addiction? 

To many people, with or without substance-abuse struggles, “healthy living” is the lesser of two evils. No one wants the inconvenience and danger of heart trouble; no one aspires to obesity that makes crossing the room exhausting; but when it comes to preventative wellness, we often visualize a life sentence of bland meals and monotonous exercise. Hence the quip, “Will this really help you live longer—or will it just feel longer?”

Whether you’re newly sober or well into your recovery, volunteering in the community is an essential part of your recovery process. Those who are of service to others have a far greater chance at long-term sobriety.

Getting Involved

Organizations like AA and NA have their own volunteer opportunities, but almost any national non-profit organization or charity offers opportunities for people to give back in some form or fashion.

Stress is a human reaction to many events or environments. Acute stress can appear and disappear quickly, without lingering effects. Chronic stress, however, can take a toll on a person. Living with chronic stress can damage the mind and body. It could also fuel an addiction, unless you have go-to methods for quickly calm down when stressed.

Use A Deep Breathing Technique
Breathing techniques are a foundation for combating stress or anxiety. Breathing is something we can control, making it useful for relaxing and clearing the mind.

Have you ever felt like you understood and shared another person’s experiences and emotions? The ability to share someone else’s feelings is called empathy. And if you’ve never known substance abuse, you may take this ability for granted.

Those struggling with addiction often lack the capacity to tune into the emotions and behaviors of others. Along with so many other important pieces of their lives, the addiction seizes their empathy.

Social media is everywhere these days, and despite its ubiquitous use, these platforms can have some detrimental effects – especially for anyone trying to maintain their sobriety.

Social Media and Your Recovery

Here’s how social media use might be negatively affecting your recovery:

Resilience can be developed. Many people have learned that firsthand this year, as they’ve had to build more resilience than they ever expected to need.

In the year or two before the pandemic, a new word started popping up in my writing about addiction, mental health and wellness: resilience. All of a sudden, the word seemed to be everywhere, from my reporting on childhood traumas to my discussions about what can help people succeed in recovery.

As the late, great Jim Morrison crooned, strange days have found us.  As millions adjust to social life filtered almost exclusively through the cold, unforgiving pixilation of digital screens, the need for genuine connection is more intense than ever.  Below are five ways of coping with isolation that do not involve more screens and may be helpful amidst these strange days that have tracked us down.